Gods reminder

 Hi everyone, 

I think it can be easy for us sometimes to ignore or forget about the little blessings or mundane parts of our lives until something something happens. For those of you who don’t already know; I was in a pretty serious car accident last weekend which totally my car and caused my airbags to go off. This is a big deal for anyone. For people with Dwarfism; airbags going off are more likely to result in serious injury or death as we tend to sit closer to the steering wheel and are significantly shorter then the average driver. 

While it is still fresh in my mind; I want to take a second to reflect on this event. Last sunday evening, I was driving down I90 business loop going westbound  headed towards I90 to go have dinner with my family like I do almost every Sunday. All of a sudden;another driver turned in front of me in order to get in the far left lane going the opposite direction. There was nothing I could do. All the airbags in my car went off and the car was totaled. Long story short; I am thankful to be alive and only have a few bumps and bruises. 

I am a firm believer that God is watching over us at all times. It can be easy in these situations to wonder why he would allow something like this to happen. Something my pastor regularly reiterates in his sermons is that God allows all things to work together for our good and his Glory. This is a phrase that I hold onto. I’m not going to pretend that I wasn’t a little angry or scared afterwards cause i was. This phase allows me to direct my attention to trying to figure out the lesson that God wants me to learn. 

This past week, as i started the recovery process, working with insurance, and car shopping online; I have been blessed in multiple ways by those around me. My family has helped to provide rides so I can get to work. My supervisor and others at work are coming along side to help me get things done while I am without a car. These are just some of the blessings that I have experienced. While I don’t fully know exactly the lesson that God is trying to teach me from this situation; I do know that he is providing a great reminder that he is the provider of all things and that in every situation we can rely on him to provide what is needed. Another thing I am being reminded of is that cars are simply material possessions. They can be replaced. You can replace things; not people. 

first year on my own

  On November 6th, 2020 my dad and I packed up the car and moved me out to Spokane, Wa. Those who were around me most between the month of November 2020-March 2021 can tell you that I was not a very pleasant person to be around. Lets face it I didn't even like being around me very much. I was filled with so many negative emotions: fear, stress, overwhelmed, alone, confusion, and frustration. While I was surrounded by family; I felt like many of them didn't really know me. Almost everyone who I felt knew me best, I had left behind in California. I can't even tell you how many nights I woke up in the middle of the night crying out because of how alone and scared I was. My fight/flight response was active most of the time. 

    I moved to Spokane to start a job as a Job coach  which helps people with disabilities find and then keep jobs. One aspect of my job was that productivity was tracked regularly and the expectation of maintaining at least a 80% productivity rate was enforced. For the first several months, I could not understand why my supervisor was not happy with my productivity. From what I understood, I was doing everything correctly( visiting my clients, attending required meetings,ect). I became frustrated because I kept getting emails from my supervisor about my productivity score and asking how she could help. Of course I recognized it was a problem but I had absolutely no idea in what way to ask for help.

    In March, I finally closed on my condo. I was happy to have my own space. For a while, I thought I had my emotional nightmare under control. In May, after receiving my first client requiring full shift assistance, my boss asked to meet with me. She brought to my attention of number of complaints/concerns that were brought forward by the clients caregiver/parent. The main compliant was about my ability to communicate or lack thereof. The caregiver and parent didn't feel like like they received the full answer whenever they would ask a question They also asked my boss whether I liked my job. I wasn't too surprised about the complaint regarding my ability to provide a full answer as that has been a habit of mine since childhood. However, I was somewhat surprised about the second question. That meeting caused me to do some serious self evaluation about where these issues were coming from. I realized that I was still holding on the fear that I thought I had let of a few months ago regarding, leaving home and being on my own for the first time(minus time spent in college). I shared with my parents and my friend Pj the conversation that I had with my supervisor and the complaints/concerns that had been brought to my attention. I also shared with them the self evaluation that I did as a result. Both Pj and my parents advised me that I needed to share that information with my boss. I did just that. My boss was understanding and by sharing my feelings with her it broke the ice allowing me to feel more comfortable with sharing things in the future.The self evaluation I did also helped me realize that I had no reason to be afraid anymore that I was safe and that there really wasn't anything to be afraid of. 

    Since then I have learned some new skills and had a few experiences that I wouldn't have expected. I joined a new church in town, learned how to knit on a loom, was elected to be the treasurer of the HOA board of the condominium that I live in, and many other fun experiences. Even though I spent every summer in Spokane growing up, I am getting to know my family better and I know they are getting to know me better too both the good and the bad. I see my brother ,Nathan, sister in law ,Chrissy, and niece,Sophie, almost every Sunday at church. If it weren't for my family and their patience and support I honestly don' t know where I would be. 

Post graduation reflection

Hi everyone,
     Four years has come and gone like leaves in the wind. I still remember getting that phone call from my admissions councilor at George Fox saying that I had been accepted. Thank you to all of you for reading these monthly blogs. These blogs allowed me to reflect on my journey through college in addition to providing an update to those of you who I didn't keep in contact with on a regular basis.
     Going to George Fox challenged me in more ways then one but Im not even going to pretend that that was bad. Going to a Quaker school allowed me to learn about and somewhat appreciate another branch of christianity that I did not grow up with. I was able to intern at and then later fully attend a quaker church were I could witness what an evangelical Friends(aka quaker)church service looked like.Up until February, the church participated in as part of their service a time called open worship. At first I didn't fully understand or appreciate what this time was used for but then the more I attended and learned about their beliefs began to appreciate and enjoy this time of the service as a time to fully engage with God and let our minds and hearts process the message that was preached.
     Attending George Fox not only helped me to learn more about myself but about my cohort and the world around me. I feel like I was truly able to learn how to advocate for myself to people that didn't already know me or the needs that I had. I was able to learn in more depth about issues happening in the world around us such as houseless-ness, unemployment, and what it truly means to be a social worker in today's world.
     The Bible tells us that God will be with us wherever we go. Well, I have felt him more in the last four years then maybe ever before.  I feel as though I have become closer to him and that my relationship with God has become stronger. I have mentioned this before in a blog or two but I have a firm belief that God created a plan for each of us as to what will happen and where we will end up in each stage of our lives.As many of you know, I had decided last fall that I was going to apply to grad schools and attend right away. Well, that clearly was not his plan. What this taught me was that we may think we know what the plan is for our lives but despite what we think will happen. God is in control and I think that was the ultimate message and lesson that I learned during the last four years.
Thanks for reading these and for following me on this journey,
Allison😊

March-April: year 4, semester 2, month 3-4

Hi everyone,
     I know this is a little late. During the month of march, I had the opportunity to participate in a lobby day put on by the National association of Social workers. This is an event done every year where social workers and social work students come and lobby for bills passing through the state legislature.  It was an interesting event. I am glad that I had the opportunity to participate but if I am being honest probably wouldn't do it again.
     A few weeks ago, I had spring break which was much needed. This break allowed me to relax but also get work done in a leisurely manner. I also had my first job interview which went great. It was for a position working with children and teens with autism. I would go into their homes and/or schools and help them implement the plan they created. I also had a great birthday.
     The next big thing is graduation. I can't believe it is here already. The closer it gets the more I excited I get for the future and what the future holds.
Thanks for reading
Allison

February: year 4 semester 2 month 2

Hello,
     This has been one crazy month. I have started applying for jobs and recently got to pick up my Cap and gown for graduation. The whole job search thing has been stressful for me not  in the sense that I am worried about what will happen if I don't get a job but more in the sense that I am worried that I won't say the right things or present myself in the right way. Even though in the moment it seems like the semester is going by really slowly, it is really speeding by. At the time I am writing this; it is already the end of the 8th week.
     Next week on March 9th I am going with my colleagues and some professors to Salem for National association of Social workers(NASW) lobby day. This is an event that the department participates in every year in order to help students understand the social workers role of fighting for legislation relevant to their clients.
     As I mentioned earlier, I applied for a family advocate position in San Jose. I am excited because it is at a Head Start program. For those of you who don't know I am currently doing an internship at a head start program so I feel as though having that experience and having some knowledge about head start and how it works will be beneficial.
     As the semester continues and opportunities continue to show up; I will be interested to see where I end up.
If you feel comfortable sharing I would be interested to know what your first paid job was as an adult?

January: Year 4 Semester 2 Month 1

Hi Everyone,
This month's update will be more about how I feel about events that have happened than the events themselves.
     This semester so far has been both mentally and emotionally exhausting. This may sound ridiculous to some of you but it is how I feel. I have been applying to Masters programs lately and just received my first rejection. I am a little disappointed but not too devastated. I have had a hard time focusing on my school work no matter how hard I try. Its those cross roads of being a student and figuring out what to do afterwards.
     This is something that I have been wrestling with internally. I know in my heart what the right way to go is but my mind is saying something complete opposite. I have been looking online at a few jobs that I think would be interesting to have post graduation if my grad school plans do not happen immediately.
     I try to always be in the mind set that God has a plan for all of us and we try to follow it but never know where it will take us. Nevertheless, I know that whether I work first or finish school first; God is in control and I will go wherever his plan takes me.
     Nothing too interesting has happened this month other than applying to programs. It has been very stressful for me because I don't like to feel as though the decision I am making is not fully agreed on. While I feel support from my family and friends no matter what happens. I can feel a vibe from my professors that let me know that they don't support that decision and they aren't afraid to show it. Sorry this update is so negative but I have been feeling many negative feelings lately and I think it is healthier to talk about them then to keep them bottled up.
See you next month on
What's going on with Allison

November: Year 4 Semester 1 Month 3

Hi,
    This month has been a busy one. At the end of October I got to go to Roloff Farms. For those of you who don't know is a famous farm from the TLC show Little People Big world. This to me was a once in a life time opportunity. When I heard that my local LPA chapter was going to be making a  trip there I knew that I had to tag along and experience in person what I have watched on TV for the past ten years. I was also able to get a picture with Amy the Matriarch of the family, take a wagon tour of the farm, and even pick a pumpkin of my own. I would say that it was well worth the effort.
      This month I also made progress in the process to apply to graduate school. I met with a few professors about letters of Recommendations and all that but the process for me is an interesting one. I think that deciding to apply to grad school and all that encompasses it is a lot harder than applying to college was. I feel like a lot more is at stake and the decision that I make could affect me for a while so I am kind of stressing about whether or not to work for a year or two or go directly into my masters. I have heard a variety of different people's experiences. Some say it is better to wait and some say that it is harder to get back into the school mode after taking a few years off and that it is better to go directly into your masters. I will say that I want to go directly into my masters but I am taking into consideration what my professors and others who have already been to graduate school have to say.
     On a happier note, I am looking forward to coming home for thanksgiving this upcoming Tuesday. It won't be long before the semester is over and Christmas break is here. I would appreciate prayers about graduate school and that I make the right decision.